Tuesday, August 3, 2010

To the Death Race and Beyond!



Friday morning we get up far too early for my taste. Slam everything into the car and hit the road. I feel ill. Not the "I ate something bad" ill but the nervous, "what have I gotten myself into?!" ill.
The house in Grande Cache that Trish rented was gorge. Such a good idea. Threw our stuff in and headed to the rec centre to pick up some sweet race kits. Wandered the mall and looked at some swag. Nothing really jumped out at me so I decided not to buy anything. The only thing I REALLY wanted was the mounted team picture. Back to the house for a delicious dinner and then it was off to the rally!


Dr. Death


Dr. Death went over the yooj; don't start fast. This race is about endurance. Death Racers can help other Death Racers. Blah, blah, blah. Gave a brief overview of each leg. Here we learned that Leg 3 & 4 had been changed for sure. Sarah was now running an extra 2 km's and I was only running 36. This we could handle.


Angels at the rally


For as long as I had waited, as much as I had prepared, Saturday came on hard and fast. Standing at the starting line, getting Kathie ready to go is a feeling one can't even describe. The energy of these fellow crazy people is intoxicating. Hearts racing, smiles abound, everyone looking fresh and clean, still thinking this is a good idea.


And she's off!


Kathie got off without a hitch and we quickly returned to the house to get Captain T ready for her first Leg (cause she's a robot and signed up for TWO). The first transition point is where it really started to hit me. It's chaos. Some teams are so sloppy. No thought or plan to their process. We assigned roles; at this one, I was to grab the jacket out of Kathie's pack and put it in Trish's, Sarah was to transfer the coin and Kathie and Trish would exchange the timing stick. It's an art. Lose any of these items and the race is over. You see people dropping things, forgetting to transfer an item, leaving without poles. There's people crying (ya it's usually me) and soloists, well soloists are a whole different breed. The set up they have just boggles the mind. Gels, salt tabs, food, shoes, socks, clothes everything pre-sorted and packaged for quick access. They'll have an entire support team around them. One to change shoes and deal with blisters. One to feed. Another to fill water and always someone talking to them. These men and women are heroes. Soloists and the people who are there to support them, both are huge undertakings. Hat's off.
Waiting for your racer to come in is a strange mix of fear and excitement. With every minute that ticks off, you get a little more worried. Did something go wrong? Is she okay? In the back of my mind, I know that every minute they take, is a minute less I have to get up and over a mountain.
Kathie rounds the corner looking GOOD. Tears start. I run to get Trish ready. "Holy shit, this is really happening!" BAM! Kathie's in, Trish is gone. Now it's that much closer to my turn. Sweet baby jesus.


Quick team photo before Trish climbs two mountains.


Kathie recaps her Leg for us. She ROCKED it! Said it was one of her best runs EVER. Pretty sure also put up a PB. So proud of her. She has been such a pillar of strength and inspiration throughout this entire process. Battling numerous physical issues and still putting in the miles. Always something good to say, a laugh to share, a story to tell.
Kathie, you're amazing and I love you. I am so proud of all that you are and all that you've done. Thank you for everything you've shared. For everything you've taught me. For just being awesomer.

Matt and I take Sarah to the transition point to meet Trish. Waiting was KILLER. Sarah handled it SO WELL. I was getting all nervous, anxious and weird but she was totally calm, cool and collected.


Totally calm, waiting for Trish.


We all misjudged Trish's time so we were there for awhile. Better us than her right? I had more of a role in this transition so I'm sorry to say I didn't get any pictures of our Captain's big finish. In waiting however, we did learn that the race started 6 minutes late, so all cutoff times had been bumped up 6 minutes. A quick check of the race bib informed us that Sarah now had until 7:21pm to finish her Leg. She had no qualms about this. Neither did I, girl is FAST. Matt ran T in and we made the switch and Sarah took off like a rocket! Trish recapped for us. She felt good. She looked good. I had no doubt that she'd be able to do it all again in 10 hours.
Trish, thank you just doesn't seem like enough. You are amazing. You're one of the strongest people I know. A true inspiration. I look up to you and admire you. I'm proud of you. Love you always.


Trish and one of her mountains, pre-race.


Now it hit me. I'M NEXT. Nerves like I've never felt before. Puke.
Gathered my shi, loaded up and headed out to the transition point. We were told at the rally that for this transition, solo and relay were separate. So we'd see the solo point, drive 3 km's farther and hit the relay point. We pass a transition on the left. Assume it's the solo, but a small voice in my head seemed to think that was actually where I finished. So confused. Keep driving. Come across a taped off section on the left, it's not a transition point but clearly a Death Race crossing. Drive a bit more and now we're all getting nervous. Did we go the right way? What if we're late? Please don't have Sarah be there waiting. The nerves over took us and we turned around, back to the taped off section to ask for directions. It's not 3 km's, it's 3 MILES from HERE. She tells me we can't miss it. Matt floors it, it's about 6:40pm. Finally come around the corner and it's PACKED. Probably 200 cars on the side of the highway. She was right, couldn't miss it. As soon as we park I jump out and start looking around for Sarah. God I hope and pray she hasn't been sitting here waiting for us. I think it's 6:46 now. A quick scan of the area lets me know that Sarah's not here yet. Huge sigh of relief. Now the waiting begins. I feel sick. I have to pee. I don't know if I can move I'm so nervous.
Matt comes over to give me some bad news. Really bad news. Cutoff is actually 7pm. Not 7:15. This is major. I hear that they're using the cutoff time from the brochure, which was printed before the distance change, and sticking to it. Sure, they're still adding the 6 minutes from the late start so this means Sarah has until 7:06 to get here. It's 6:52. 13 minutes. If only we had a way to tell her! My hero of a husband decides to do just that. He runs out as far as he legally can to let her know as soon as he sees her. Meanwhile, Kathie and I are waiting, stomachs turning for our sweet Sarbear to come around the corner. I'm keeping one ear on the volunteers, trying to hear if they're going to cut people off. My fingers are still crossed that the 7:06 rumour is just that. A nasty rumour. I've checked my bib again, it says 7:15. I'm holding tight to this fact with two hands. 7:01 rolls by and they are still letting people continue. A soloist comes in at 7:07. They tell him his race is over. My Death Race dreams have been crushed. He's PISSED. Clearly he had been pacing himself with the 7:15 in mind. I can't see Matt to let him know. I don't have the heart to tell Kathie just yet so I sit with it. In a porta-potty. With my tears. As I'm walking back, I see Matt come running in. Yes, running. In his flippy floppies. "What are you doing?! Let's go!" I just shrug and shake my head. The look on his face kills me. He knows how much I've put into this. How long I've been looking forward to it. I get there in time to see Sarah time in. In time to see them tell her that her race is over. Crushed is the first thing that comes to mind. I walk over and hold her. Let her know that it's not her fault. Tell her to not let some politics take away from what she just did.
Sarah ran the race of her LIFE. She added 2 km's and beat her PB by almost a full 10 minutes. Matt said watching her bust out that last little bit was inspiring. I'm sad I missed it. I hear it was full on, balls out SPEED. She timed in at 7:13. Didn't even need the extra 6 minutes.


Epic finish.


Sarah, you are truly amazing. How you can train, work full time and deal with a sweet and active little man is an inspiration. Thank you for your unwavering support. I'm so proud of all you've accomplished. Love you long time.

My weekend didn't exactly turn out as planned. I think we were all pretty emotional for the rest of it. I drank a jug o' wine (Thanks Ma!!!) with a little help from my Angels. Still though, all things happen for a reason and maybe one day I'll know what that reason is.


Drinking at the finish line. Cause I'm classy like that.


My girls are incredible. I feel so blessed to have gone through this process with them. I knew when I started this that it was about the journey, not the destination. I still got some lifetime friends, still grew my love for trail running, still learned so much about myself and my limits. Being able to say "I'm a Death Racer" wouldn't change any of that. Sure, I'm disappointed. It's still too raw for me to say what I'll do next. Is the Death Race dead to me? Do I want to try again? When? What Leg? So many questions that will only be answered in time.
Regardless, I say Thank You. To my team: Each of you holds a special place in my heart forever. "Thank you" and "I love you" will fall short every time. I've learned so much about myself through each of you.
To my family: Thank you for your support, your never faltering faith in me. When the road got rough, your confidence pushed me through.
To my friends: Thank you for listening to me go on about this for the last 7 months. For taking an interest in my training and supporting me with your thoughts, words and actions. I couldn't be here without all of you.
To my amazing Dr. McDreamy husband: I love you so much. Thank you for all of your support throughout this entire ride. For taking on more at home, for letting me sleep through the night, for pushing me out of bed or out the door as I'm growling at you. Thank you for never questioning my ability to do this. For being a pillar of strength. For picking me up when I fell. Thank you for being there. Thank you for the integral role you played this past weekend. Your knowledge, guidance and words of encouragement will never be forgotten. I love you.


He's allowed to be tired, he ran more than me!

Monday, July 26, 2010

From There to Here


Seven months ago, Cason was born. Best Boxing Day EVER!
Since then, he's had almost four teeth come in, started solid food, said "mama" and "dada". He's rolling and crawling, holding his own bottle and growing at a rate that blows my mind.

Within the first minute of 2010, I had registered myself for the Canadian Death Race.
February 15 was my very first run. Clocked in at a whopping 19 minutes. A hard 19 minutes at that.
I've gone from running 19 minutes around the block, to running 21 km's of trail. From knowing very little about this "sport" to reading about different techniques weekly.
Now, I'm 5 sleeps away from calling myself a "Death Racer". One week away from finishing what I started. 6 days from completing the biggest personal goal I've ever set.
I'm nervous and excited. My mental game is starting to crack with anticipation. It's hard to focus on anything for any amount of time. I've got lists all over the place, gear, food, training logs. Now I just need to slow down, let my body do what I've trained it to do.
"The mind is the limit. We know that it is not the body. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it- as long as you really believe 100%. It’s all mind over matter."

Go like hell.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Conversations with Kiara


Me:"Kiara, we can't sit on people."
Kiara:"Don't sit on Teiryn mom?"
Me:"You can't sit on Teiryn or Cason. You can't sit on anyone. You could hurt them."
Kiara:"Only adults mom?"
Me:"Yes, you can sit on adults."
Kiara:"And rabbits mom? Sit on rabbits?"
Me:"Noooo, I don't think that's a good idea either. Only adults."
Kiara:"Rattles?"
Me:"No rattles."
Kiara:"Maybe next time? Maybe later?"
Me:"No"
Kiara:"Maybe go for a drive and see the rattles later mom?"
Me:"Um, maybe not?"
Kiara:"Ok"

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Scared of the Dark

I'm scared of the dark.
And the wilderness.
I have no idea what possessed me to run SOLO at 11:30pm on a Friday night.
Clearly, I am not normal.
I will be finishing Leg 4 in the dark. The wee morning hours. So, natch, I want to get in a few night runs. Plus I did some reading on the subject and people warned of getting motion sickness when running with the headlamp. This didn't even occur to me.
I'm also scared of puking.
I was excited all day. Until about 10:45. Then the nerves kicked in. And I tried to come up with a good reason not to. Unforch, 38 km's over a mountain in 20 some days kept winning. Balls.
Only car in the lot. Good? Bad? Nervous. Set out up the first hill.
"Ok. I can do this."
A CRAZY storm had just past and everything was wet, muddy, felt like running on water covered plastic but that's what poles are for right? Thought I heard strange noises at the top. Stopped. Looked around. Got my RUN on. I had an idea running scared would increase my speed.
I was doing it!
Running in the dark!
In the wilderness!
And not being eaten!
Awesome!
Heard it again. Now I'm freaked out. There's got to be someone behind me. I can't see the parking lot.
"What if they've been waiting the whole night for some stupid girl to come out here by herself?! WHAT IF I'M THAT GIRL!?"
Know what it was? The massive power lines above me. When nothing else is going on, they make strange noises that I'm not used to. Lames mcplanes.
Running with the headlamp wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I'll try it next time without a hat. Those 2 feet right in front of you make a difference.
I was super tense. My toe hurt. (Cause I broke it. Sweet.) And I was SCARED. Did not want to be out there by myself. Plus, I decided it was dangerous. All muddy and stuff. So I bailed. Headed home after 20 minutes. Turned right around and booked it through a field cause I heard a noise.
"Fuck THIS!"
I was out.
So glad I'm not doing Leg 5. So. Glad.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Conversations with Kiara

Me:"Kiara, do you know that I love you more than there is water in the ocean? I love you bigger than mountains!"
Kiara:"Rocks mom?"
Me:"I love you more than there are rocks in the WORLD!"
Kiara:"Yep. Two rocks."

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

What am I doing?!

Last night we gave Cason his first round of "real" food.

It's been a pretty rough couple of days around here so I had the secret intention of it helping him sleep. Lord knows I like to keep my babies babies as long as possible. Alas, it failed. Well the sleep part anyway. Cason LOVED his sweet potatoes. Grabbed the spoon right out of my hand! His motor skills are so much more developed then Kiara's were at this point.



Decided to forgo training last night so I could get some sleep.
Here's how that went down:

Stayed up until 10:30, barely, nursing Cason "one more time". Went to bed.
Got Cason at 11.
Put him back in the crib around 1.
Got him at 2.
Put him back in the crib around 3.
Got him at 3:30.
Kiara woke up at 4.
I got back to bed around 5.
Kiara wakes up for the day at 7:15.
So much for a night of sleep.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Falling in love is hard on the knees.

Or back as it would seem.
Sunday night I went for my first real, long, solo trail run. To say I loved it would be an understatement. Being in love doesn't even come close to what I feel for trail running now.

Pre Sunridge last weekend.

Matt and the kids dropped me off at Sunridge shortly before 8pm. Of course, as soon as I start up the first hill (nice warm up right?) it starts raining. With hard wind. And lighting. And even a little thunder. I was giddy with excitement.
Had some issues with the ol' Garmin getting started. Tech support, I am not. Got it figured. Had my intervals set for 10 hours instead of 10 minutes. No wonder I didn't hear a beep!
Bottom of the first ski hill I saw a guy clearly looking for something. As I was ascending the "mountain" I heard him whistle. Then I saw it. A dog. A big old black one. Who looked so lost and sad and thirsty. I pointed him in the right direction and carried on. He took off in front of me. So I stopped. Called him over, and walked him back to meet his owner who was making his way up the hill. I even TOUCHED him. A dog. Me. Who woulda thunk? That one's for you mama!
Carried on rather uneventful for the duration of the Sunridge portion. I ran without music. I've actually decided I like that better. Crazy as it sounds, I can focus more without music. 10 and 1's were a godsend! Totes be using those bad boys again.
Over the bridge and through Rundle I really tried to focus on my stride and my speed. Ate some jelly beans. Ran in the mud and puddles every chance I could. Over the Ainsworth bridge and back into the trees. Towards the latter half of this I started to lose focus and my legs were getting TENSE. Had my frozen apple juice (thinking this will be my post race treat?) and increased my walk breaks as needed.
In the home stretch, it started to get DARK. I didn't have a headlamp and was thinking I could still take the river valley trails right to the house. Until I hit a heavily treed area. I sprinted through that bad boy let me tell you! It was dark and scary. What have I got myself into?
Once I climbed up into the city again, I had a goal in my head that I wanted to be home by 11. All I wanted. Of course, I couldn't see the time on my watch. I did happen by a large sign that told me it was only 10:27. SHAAWHAA?!?!??!?! I actually giggled.
Losing focus, those last couple blocks are HARD, I changed songs. Hoping against hope that I'd get my Death Race mantra. Mika's "We Are Golden". And I DID! Clearly it was a sign. From whom I don't really care. As soon as it came on, I had the NIKE commercial in my head. And I RAN the last 5 blocks home. The kind of real running that makes people nervous. When I hit the front yard I wanted to scream. I wasn't ready to stop. I was pumped. So proud of myself. And maybe I cried a little. *shrugs*
Best run ever. I LOVE THIS SHIT!

*Well mostly. I haven't really been able to pick up the kids or walk the last two days cause my back eff'd up. But that comes with it right? Matt thinks it's because of my "transverse abdominal". Yay, more core work.