Love Thy Neighbour

****Caution: I use bad words****

We've had some new neighbours move in. This is the 4 "family" in 3 years. I've hated all but the first set. Them, I disliked. This is an old rant about the 3 family. Good for a laugh while I work on some stories about the newbies. Enjoy!

For those of you that don't know, I live in the ghetto. And I don't mean ghetto like the cool kids say. I mean, crack house in the back alley, bums pushing carts down the alley/street to the handy bottle depot on the corner. G-H-E-T-T-O.
Once in awhile, some smelly bum or drunken indian will meander through our yard. I feel angry and violated all at once. Not in the fun way either. Since Fred came out and re-built the fence and gate for us, we haven't had a problem. Thank god. I HATE people in my space, touching my things, LEAVING THEIR FUCKING GARBAGE!!!!

Every so often, in the backyard (attached to said alley) bums and slimy punk kids throw their garbage. Charming right? I hate it, but I put on my big girl panties, my garbage gloves (canvas and get used for nothing else) and pick it up. It's usually nothing too major and along the back fence. Rude, disrespectful and ignorant but I manage to cope. Over the winter, I noticed that the garbage seemed to be making it's way closer to the house. I don't think empty pop cans can fly that far. I mentioned to Matt that I'm pretty sure our neighbours are doing it. At the time, it was only a piece or two and who knows? Maybe it was really windy. Only in the backyard. That happens right? Again, frustrating, but I managed to deal. We actually "know" our neighbours. We say Hi, know each others names and occasionally shovel each others sidewalk. I even went over to tell him that his car was about to get towed. No fucking more.
I took out the garbage this evening. Not on my list of chores but Matt's ill so I sucked it up. As I was collecting garbage from the yard, I noticed a pile of burnt ichiban. Right beside my fence. My side shared with the fucking noisy ass neighbours fence. No doubt they over cooked dinner because they were too busy drinking their 40's of Old English and just decided to dump it over the fence. I was mad. Then I looked up. Wwwwaaaaaaaayyyyyy up. And lo and behold, near the front of my house, is a large pile of snow. You mean to tell me they've been shovelling their snow into my yard?! Are you kidding me? I approach to investigate, Horatio Caine's got nothing on me. And what do I see? Do my eyes deceive me?! Not only have they been shovelling snow into my yard, THEY'VE BEEN SHOVELLING THEIR DOG SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Into my fucking yard. As in throwing it over the goddamn fence. Who fucking does that?!?!?!?!?!?!!?
I was (and am still) PISSED. Like Mike Muise lied to my face fucking ANGRY!! Shaking, seething MAD. So what do I do? First things first. Shovelling some shit back into their yard. It should be noted that I have a strong dislike for dogs. Number 1 reason? I HATE DOG SHIT. I hate yippy dogs, and happen to be surrounded by 5. The smell of dog shit from my neighbours (on both sides) yards is more then enough thank you very much. But in my fucking yard?! I don't think so.
You may be asking yourself, why didn't she just go over and talk to them? I've got to admit, I'm a pretty nice person. I like to keep the peace. However, these neighbours are scary. I'm talking domestic dispute scary. Chasing people out of your house with a baseball bat screaming at 5 in the morning scary. I'm not walking into that.

Instead, I will call the city. Maybe have them check if the dogs are licensed or if I can file a formal complaint. In the meantime, I'll just keep throwing the shit back over the fence. And maybe a dirty diaper or two.